a Short Bio

I was born and raised in Colorado, at the feet of the mountains that serve as backdrop to almost every memory.  I have two amazing parents and three older brothers who are the world to me.  My parents each ventured out from their own families to settle in Colorado and as the “black sheep” of their respective families, they gave rise to a flock of black sheep with their own children.  We are all uniquely weird kids.

After high school and a year off I moved to New York to attend college.  It was a strange experience, leaving the only home I’d ever known and moving in with other adolescents to figure ourselves out under the magnifying glass of communal living.  But I was lucky to make some very good friends there and, while my degree doesn’t help me a lick in the real world, learning what I was interested in learning is a privilege not all have the opportunity to have and I’m grateful for it.

I also met my husband there, during my fourth year.  As my graduation grew near and our courtship had not quite reached the point where such a suggestion would be reasonable, Kevin asked if I’d like to live with him for a while, since I didn’t have firm plans of where I’d end up after school ended.  Happily, our friendship and relationship evolved in such a way that I did want to move in with him and we began our life together in the Hudson Valley of New York.

After watching every Kung Fu movie imaginable (far more than I knew existed), I told Kevin I was through – no more!  He insisted on one more, promising it was something I’d never seen before and I gave in.  He popped in Ong Bak and I was introduced to Muay Thai – I was astounded and romanced by the beauty of the movements.  I had, indeed, never before seen anything like it.

In 2008 I began training Muay Thai under the instruction of Kumron Vaitayanon (Master K) who teaches out of his basement in Paterson, New Jersey.  Master K embodies the beauty and finesse of Muay Thai in a way that nobody else does.  He’s funny, brilliant at teaching and dissecting technique, adamant at getting things right and old-fashioned in a way that is at once charming and frustrating.  So of course I grew to love him.

Filming my sessions with Master K began as an exercise in keeping track of my lessons, getting everything down because each 90 minute class was so packed with information and detail.  But it grew beyond that as I discovered what a rare and precious thing it is to know and train with someone like Master K – if indeed there is anyone else like Master K – and the videos and YouTube channel became an earnest effort to preserve his legacy and disseminate his technique.  It is such a gift to know him, to be in his presence and learn a kind of Muay Thai that is fast disappearing; sharing as much as I can of it is as much a compulsion as a responsibility.

As I pushed my way into the ring and fighting, I became a stronger part of the story on YouTube.  I began recording and posting Video Journal Updates to express my experiences verbally.

In Winter of 2009 Master K underwent an operation on his heart (the man is invincible as it is and then it turns out he’s been a superman despite pinched arteries!) and the experience caused both him and me to consider the temporal limits of our training together.  Master K bounced back stronger than ever, but he thought for a minute, in the darkness, that he would stop being able to teach.  It was then that my husband and I decided we must go to Thailand to train for the first time.  We owed it to Master K to get a good basis upon which all of his detailed, Ph.D level technique could be grafted.

Thailand opened up a new world to me.  Training full-time, sleeping 400 feet away from the gym (rather than 60 miles away in NY!) and fighting with frequency and without fanfare was liberating and inspiring.

When I got back to New York I began training with Kru Nat Fuz, who had just opened her own gym in midtown, Chok Sabai.  Having a female trainer was a very different experience and a wonderful addition to the training I still had with Master K.  Kru Nat became my “fight coach” and I was exceedingly happy to have opportunities to fight in the US.

Through Kru Nat I had the chance to meet Ying Ross, who is a Thai filmmaker (and truly brilliant cinematographer) shooting a film about female Muay Thai fighters.  Ying has been a great friend to me and has become a quiet presence in my Muay Thai journey since we met.  She connects me to her friends in Thailand, who are some of the kindest and most generous persons I’ve ever met, and encourages me in a quiet, steady manner that is very much in the vein of her essence.  I adore Ying.

My husband and I intended to return to Thailand after one year with the hope of an extended stay.  Due to debilitating student loan payments, the amount of money we would have to save in order to be able to afford living abroad was considerable.  I kept training and fighting as much as I could in the US, finding (or being found by) good souls who offered me training, sparring partners, support and inspiration.  In heaps.

After six fights with Kru Nat as my coach we had a disagreement and our training together stopped.  It was painful, but we remain in contact.  As a result, however, I pushed to start training with Kaensak Sor. Ploenjit, to whom I was introduced by Master K as they are friends.  Kaensak is one of the greatest Muay Thai fighters in history and was named “Fighter of the Year” in Thailand two years in a row – an enormous honor and achievement.

Master K was delighted when I started training with Kaensak.  He told me often that Kaensak is the best and to pay close attention to what he teaches me.  It’s immediately evident what Kaensak is – you can see it in the way he moves, how he carries himself, the way he slips into perfect and powerful movements with ease like something he’s done 100,000 times.  He has that “ex-fighter” quality that can only be witnessed and not explained.  It’s like watching a bird take flight or a dolphin leap out of the water – the mechanical justification of the movement says nothing of how it’s really done, or what it truly is.  Celestial isn’t the right word, but it’s close.

I learned a great deal from Kaensak, perhaps most important of which is how to play.  He would spar with me for 15-40 minutes non-stop, getting me to the point that I was too tired to be self-conscious.  Master K has a few classic phrases, my favorite of which is “we need that one!” in response to a proper technique.  Kaensak has a phrase too, which is “I don’t care.”  He says it in a goading way, when you land a kick on him and he doesn’t block it – he just steps in and says, “I don’t care” while he forces you to back off or block something yourself.  It’s a motto, a mantra.  And it is exquisitely Thai.

Master K and Kaensak are opposites in a wonderful way.  Kaensak is not detail oriented or even focused on technique.  He teaches technique as a way of dealing with an opponent and stresses that you have to be relaxed in order to execute any of it.  Play around, try things.  Master K knows that technique is what allows for speed and power; the proper technique for a knee will make any knee you throw a fight-ender.  Do it right and it is beautiful.  When I fought, Master K would give me the rundown of what I did wrong, what to work on and how to fix it, how to perform.  Kaensak would tell me that win/lose doesn’t matter, don’t get discouraged because fighting is a learning process.

My husband and I had finally saved enough money to move to Thailand for a year, to train and fight full-time.  When I told Kaensak his face lit up, “A year?  Really?  Fight a lot, get experience,” he said.  Master K said, “Don’t go!”  Both men expressed exactly the feelings I had about the adventure.  I was incredibly excited at the prospect of training and fighting, getting experience and improving, dedicating myself to this art which I love so much.  And I didn’t want to leave Master K.  He has become part of my family and seeing him gives me strength.  I miss him immeasurably, but he is always with me and the pain of not being near him is less than the pain of failing to become the fighter both he and I believe I can be.

 

 

Me, We

 

Comments
  • Patti Gassaway
    Reply

    Inspiring, all the way through. So damn proud to call you daughter.

  • Todd Boone
    Reply

    I’ve been following you since day one and just wanted to let you know that your growth is tremendous.Your Muay Thai from your first fights to now is so much improved. Your an inspiration to me who also has aspirations on fighting in the near future…..Keep up the Great work!

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      Dear Todd, what an amazing message to receive. You’ve certainly made my day! Thanks for sticking with me through all of this and please let me know how your fight path is taking form.

      • Todd Boone
        Reply

        First, great “Elbow Ko”! As far as me and fighting…..I’ve always wanted to fight since a pre-teen. Back then boxing was my sport of choice and although its my first love Ive taken up MMA. I always wanted to fight, but never really pursued it seriously. Through getting married, having children and working the late shift, I ballooned to a whooping 342lbs. Also, around that time my father in-law had a sudden heart attack and past away. At that moment I knew I had to change my life style. So in 2011 my wife and I had lap-band surgery and my weight lose journey began. I decided that I didn’t want to just go to a gym and hit the treadmill because that got boring. So I decided that I wanted to fight that way I could lose weight and pursue a lifelong dream. Today I’m down 97lbs and counting and if I can continue to lose and progress in mma, I may be able to fight on the November card. Sorry for the long post

        • Sylvie
          Reply

          Wow, 97 lbs! Congratulations on all you’ve accomplished thus far and very inspiring that you’re pushing on to the next stage.
          It seems to me that martial arts training (and I include boxing in there) is really perfectly suited for weight loss and life overhaul, mostly because it’s as mentally demanding as it is physically. There was some dude who fought in a recent UFC – maybe from New Mexico? – who used to weigh in the mid-200s and has dropped down to maybe 160-170 lbs and is fighting now. Makes the fight in the ring seem pretty easy by comparison to what he’s put his body through to get there; he definitely fights with a kind of joy that other fighters don’t necessarily have. I definitely connect the way my body is now to my training – like every muscle has been carved out of my love for this sport.
          Does your wife do any training or is she more comfortable with a traditional western gym?

  • Todd Boone
    Reply

    She is more for the traditional western gym, but I still try and get her to do some Jui jitsu with me..lol…..As far as weight-loss everyone says “Bust your ass in the gym and give it 110% and the fight is the easy part.” So that’s how I train.

  • Todd Boone
    Reply

    Also, my mother in law lives up the hill from Master K and for years I contemplated seeing about muay thai classes, but never did.

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      You should go have a lesson! You can email or call him, he’s always excited to share his Muay Thai with new students.

  • Todd Boone
    Reply

    I think I will before the summer is over.

  • Kristen
    Reply

    Hi Sylvie, thank you for your blog posts and videos. I have my first fight in 4 weeks and I have been gaining education and inspiration from you since day 1 of my training. Your blog about female psyche in the ring is 100% true. It’s hard to be taken seriously and the mental challenge is definitely tough to overcome with the “am i good enough” running through the mind. All the best in your 21st fight :)

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      Thank you Kristen. I’m very moved by comments such as yours and I’m excited to hear you are so close to your first fight. Chok dee!
      I think the greatest challenge is always the one within one’s self, to give one’s self permission to let go, to succeed, to lose without being defeated. I’m starting to suspect that the question should not be “am I good enough” but “am I strong enough” and the answer to the latter is always, always “yes.”

  • Patsy
    Reply

    Hi Sylvie,

    I am a big fan. When I am out of town or working late and can’t train at my gym, I watch your videos and learn something new. I enjoy reading the blog posts also. Good luck with the rest of your training. :D Patsy, Houston, TX

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      Hi Patsy,
      That’s wonderful to hear. Master K taught me that you can train Muay Thai anywhere – he harasses his wife while she’s cooking so that she’ll try to slap him and he works on his “head movement” and slips to avoid her strikes. He says it’s good practice because she hits HARD.
      Best,
      Sylvie

  • Keshia Harris
    Reply

    Hi,
    I just game across your site and I must say it could not have come at a better time. I have been training martial arts for 3 1/2 years and doing muay thai for the last 5 months. I love the sport. I love everything about it. It has made me a far better person then I couldve ever imagined. Im healthy, feel amazing and there is no sport I would rather do. However I am 20 years old and 104 lbs. I had one demo about a month after I started training but there seems to be nobody my weight to fight. So, I train hard and support the guys when they fight but I want nothing more than to be in the ring. Everyone is constantly on me to gain weight. I’ve been eating more and drinking weight gainer shakes but nothing seems to be working. There is so much pressure to put weight on that I have become extremely self concious. When Im at the gym Im constantly thinking that people are looking at me as the skinny white girl, Im beginning to think people see me as a joke when I say I want to fight. I was just wondering if you’ve ever dealt with this and if maybe you had any advice you could give me. Thanks.
    -Keshia

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      Hi Keshia,

      I’m very familiar with that feeling. For a long time I was unaware that other women my size even existed in my area (who were training/fighting, of course) and I had no sparring partners. Every now and again someone would say they knew someone my size and when I came in contact with that someone she would be at least 10-15 lbs heavier, but relatively close in height or something. The pressure to gain weight was not necessarily high because I didn’t belong to a gym, but it was pretty ubiquitous in terms of being the only or most obvious solution for everyone who wanted to offer their two cents. (It did help for me to remind people that at 100 lbs, if you want me to gain 5 lbs it’s literally asking me to gain 5% of my total body mass. Ask a dude who’s 150 lbs to do this and they’ll understand it’s not as easy as it sounds – 5 lbs is not “just 5 lbs” to everyone. And the solution of “just eat more” is not the kind of weight you want to gain, nor is it as simple or as easy as that sounds.)

      What turned it around for me was going to my first fight at a tournament down in Virginia. The greatest impact that experience had for me was opening up my network – I met two women relatively my size (for the purpose of fighting we were in the same catch-weight class) and they happened to be from my state. So I got introduced to not only two women “out there in the world” who were my fighting size, but started getting more connections at large around the country and indeed the world. There isn’t a huge group of women this size, but there are quite a lot more than it first seems. The difficulty is that we have to travel to fight one another, whereas the golden weight classes can get more local competition.

      There are easy ways to find opponents – the difficult part is getting a promoter to sponsor the travel of either you or your opponent. But I can give you a list of fighters I know (can you send me an email: [email protected]), as well as a way to find fighters on a recurring basis. (I often have fought women who are bigger than I am, so my options have been greater, but if you want to stay only within your weight you can still find opponents.)

      The easiest way to look for fighters across the country is by looking at these tournaments because they pull from all over. Just this past July was the TBD Muay Thai Classic, which has the registered fighters listed for each year in the top right corner of the page. This is the “novice” registration: http://www.tbasanctioning.org/2011MTC/MTC2011_Ladies_Novice.htm; and the list of champions from this year: http://www.tbasanctioning.org/2012Champions.htm
      Another sanctioning body is the WKA, which has Nationals every year in Virginia and lists registered fighters: http://www.wkausa.com/wkanorthamerican2012.html
      As well as the IKF World Classic in Florida: ikfkickboxing.com

      These are all, of course, East Coast productions and there are probably similar events elsewhere in the country. I’m not sure where you’re located, but probably by looking at these registration lists you can find someone near you and have your coach contact their coach/gym and start getting your name out there.

      I don’t mean to make it sound like it’s easy. It’s difficult to be outside of the average and it’s easy to go through options quickly. I fought the same women more than once and took fights that I had no business taking at the stage I was in with my experience and skill set. I fought bigger opponents because I wanted to fight and it was better for me to take the fight than to wait six months or a year (or more) to find the “right” opponent who I could most certainly beat and keep a clean record, etc. That’s one of the biggest reasons I moved to Thailand: I’d basically run out of opponents and didn’t want to wait it out. But I refused to believe about myself that I was “too small” for anything. But being small is not a problem any more than gaining weight is a solution. Lack of peers our size in our own gym or lack of examples in rings at the fights we watch is a challenge, but it’s not a deficit. What you or I love about Muay Thai is how it feels, how our bodies move and adjust and grow as we learn it, how beautiful and powerful it is – and none of those things have anything to do with one’s size.

      And lastly, I have put on a little weight since arriving in Thailand. I didn’t try to gain weight and I’m not doing anything special with diet or weight lifting, but the added muscle helps as most of these women are still bigger than I am. But the point is that I’m not stressing about gaining or losing mass and I’m at the gym 8 hours a day and that’s why there’s been a change. So the protein shakes, creatine, 6 meals per day, etc of trying to gain weight as a person who goes to school, has a part-time or full-time job, etc is far more effort than it’s worth if the results aren’t coming. Don’t let anyone try to convince you that you’re too small to fight. In a country where “making weight” is considered the primary advantage, start thinking to yourself that you’re going to beat women who are putting effort into meeting a number on a scale while you’re pouring your effort into training and improving. Happily sip water before weigh-in while your opponent and all the dudes around you are zombied out waiting to be weighed in so they can just have some liquid.

  • Jill (Guido) Jacob
    Reply

    Dear friend, reading your blog almost puts me to tears. Your journey has inspired and motivated so many, including myself, people like you are hard to come by. This selfless act of sharing, most people (especially fighters) would not do. You and I share the same sentiment in that there are no secrets to being a “successful” fighter – there is nothing to hide here. There are so many, women and men alike, who experience the same frustrations with learning a new art, your words are extremely comforting – I can’t tell you how many times I’ve nodded my head in agreement while reading your posts.

    Thank you, Sylvie, for inspiring me. For inspiring others.

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      Jill, your comments here mean a great deal to me and I almost don’t know how to respond because you’ve been a source for inspiration and support for me simply by being who you are doing what you do. You’ve been very generous with me while never implying that there was anything owed for it or that such consideration was held in limited reserve – I reckon you’re as kind to everyone as you are to me until you’re given reason not to, and I think that’s more rare than it aught to be. And in such a small world as female Muay Thai, the cost of keeping is simply too high.

      I’m so moved to hear these words from you and thank you in return for inspiring me!

  • Keshia Harris
    Reply

    Hi Sylvie,
    I apologize for my late reply but training and working both full time doesnt leave a lot of spare time. I appreciate your comments and advice so much. It has made me feel a lot better about my size and my love. You are so right, I love the beauty of the sport and the way the body can move and react. There is nothing like it.
    It was a real eye opener when you mentioned that at 100 lbs to gain 5 is asking to gain 5% of total body mass. I had never thought about it those terms. I just hopped on the scale and was depressed that despite my efforts the number wouldnt fluctuate past a couple pounds. Now, however, im focusing on how I feel instead of how I look or how much I weigh. And now that im not streesing about the number, my enjoyment at the gym is back where it was and im having fun again.
    Again, I cant tell you how much it means to talk to a women who is my size and has succeeded in the sport that I love. I truley hope I can meet up with you someday as I have a lot of respect for you.
    Im training and living in Toronto. Although I still dont have a fight set up, Im working hard and planning a trip to Ohio in september to fight. Im confident in myself and know that “its not the size of the dog in the fight but the size of the fight in the dog”.

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      A woman I know on Facebook who lives in Trinidad and Tobago posted a picture of a little girl in boxing gloves that says something like, “If size mattered the elephant would be the king of the jungle.” I liked that.
      There’s a man in Calgary named Mike Miles who used to have a lot of smaller fighters, in the 105 lbs and under weight. I know he still has fighters as I was on the same card as one of his larger fighters last year, so maybe you could have your coach look into possible opponents with his camp as well. That’s exciting that you’re looking at fighting in Ohio so soon!

      I would love to meet you and train with you someday – if you could come to Thailand it would be fantastic. We’re still considered “small” here, but when you walk around the streets you see lots of women who are even smaller – like 60 lbs. It’s amazing. I think a main difficulty with being an uncommon size (large or small) is that it is addressed as an abnormality that should be “fixed” in some way. Just knowing that there are other women out there in the world making it work is very comforting – Sylvie Charbonneau was that relief for me when I saw that she was out here in Thailand, working her way toward 50 fights. Your existence is as much a comfort to me as my existence is to you :)

      Let me know how your training and fight search is going!

  • Lindsey
    Reply

    Your blog is FANTASTIC. And I love the octopus art background too! I see that you are training at Lanna. I’m trying to pick a place near Chiang Mai to train this spring for a few months. Lanna is one consideration, but I’m also looking at a few other camps in that area, and it’s hard to decide. But maybe I’ll see you around!

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      Wow, thank you. The octopus is from a Greek artist named Alexis Marcou and from there it was adjusted and integrated with this amazing Thai temple pattern by my web designer, Deep Soni. I absolutely love it, too.
      I haven’t trained at any of the other gyms in Chiang Mai, but if you have any questions about Lanna please let me know. I will be completely honest. In whatever case you should definitely drop me a line when you’re here.

  • Adrienne
    Reply

    I came across your excellent blog, which led me to some of your fighting videos as well. Just wanted to say that your blog and writing style are really good, and of course your fights are kick-ass. I just started Muay Thai in the DC area but don’t expect to be as good as you in the future. Also, question – I will be in Chiang Mai on vacation in Nov. but will not be there on a Friday (missing out on Kalare Friday nights). Are there regular fights on Tuesdays also at Kalare? I hear the other venues are very tourist oriented (not real fights) but correct me if I’m wrong.

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      Hi Adrienne,
      Thanks for reading my blog and for taking time to watch my videos. I’m really hoping to be able to extend this experience beyond the year, so hopefully there will be much more of both.
      Kalare definitely has fights on Tuesdays. It’s less crowded than Fridays and there tend to be good matches. I’ve not visited the third stadium, so I cannot comment on the quality of fights there, but out of the other two Kalare is far superior. They’re all “real” fights, but Kalare has better matched bouts and higher caliber fighters from what I’ve seen.
      Let me know when you are out here and maybe I can come down to the fights also. Will you be doing any training while you’re here?

  • Muaythaikid
    Reply

    Hey I train wit keansak but being they closed the pompton gm all they have is whippany left how’s training with mr K paterson is where I work and I live in pompton n paterson is closer then Whippany I don’t wanna leave keansak he’s a close friend of mine and we even go out for drinks and to hang out places but with gas and being a long cold drive aafter training now in the winter is really killing me so I was looking somewhere a little closer to me until they decided to open an AMA back around pompton again and I hear alot of great things about master K

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      Hi,
      Did they close Pompton because of the storm or permanently? That sucks for Kaensak if it’s totally closed – was nice just walking across the parking lot to work.
      I lived in New York when I was training with Master K and Kaensak, so it was an hour drive to see either of them. I totally know the pain of long, cold drives!
      Training with Master K is great. He’s different from Kaensak but very detail-oriented and he teaches very good technique for power and speed. He trains folks just out of his basement and has tons of equipment to work on specific elements. He’s also very good for working around schedules – you can go see him any day of the week from 11:00 AM – 8:00 PM; just shoot him an email or call him: http://masterkelbowko.com/contact/contact.htm
      You can always just check out some of my videos on YouTube to get a feel for training with Master K (just search for “Master K” on the site; almost all the videos are our training). I recommend and encourage anyone to train with him. There’s really nobody like him.

  • jonas
    Reply

    hey i am trying to do the same as you and visit thailand for a year or so. how much $$$ is necessary to do so would you say?

    • Sylvie
      Reply

      Hi Jonas,
      That depends on where you want to go. It’s cheaper up north and more expensive in Bangkok and down on the islands. Then you also have to take into consideration what your personal living habits are.
      Don’t worry about finding living accommodations prior to coming out (unless you want to train somewhere that does not have accommodations outside of the gym – like in Isan, for example) as it’s very easy to find an apartment when you’re in Thailand and can price shop. In Bangkok a cheaper apartment is around 5,000-9,000 Baht/month base pay and utilities are on top of that (but utilities are very cheap out here), whereas in Chiang Mai the more expensive apartments are reaching 5,000 Baht/month and you can get as low as 3,500/month and still have air-con, cable, internet, etc. Food is about 30 Baht ($1) for a single meal out of a simple restaurant, cheaper from street vendors and upward from that if you go to a foreign-food or fancier restaurant. Bangkok prices are a bit higher, but not much; food is very cheap out here. Most apartments, ANYWHERE, do not have a kitchen and most urban Thais depend on restaurants for meals. Then you just have to factor in what kind of transportation you’ll want – rent/buy a moped or just use public transportation (share cabs). And training depends on the camp. Plus, you’ll have to figure in how many border runs or visits to the embassy you need to make to renew your visa, which for us is 500 Baht per renewal, plus the cost of the bus ticket (we do the border run). I think the embassy is more expensive per renewal, but you don’t have to travel as far.
      SO, all that being said so that you can take into consideration what your expenses are, I’d say that you can easily live anywhere in Thailand for $1,000 per month and can probably get away with less if you’re thrifty or if you end up in an inexpensive area.

  • liz
    Reply

    hi Sylvie, I remember watching you in NYC friday night fights! I might still have the fight card where youre on. I train in Muay Thai and youtube a lot of fights and look up a lot of information, especially on female fighters and never realized you were the same woman I saw live. I don’t remember who you fought, but you did great and watching you so far I have to say you have improved to much, you’re awesome! So I really wanted to ask your advice, I;m 5ft2 120lbs and in my gym there aren’t many females, so I don’t have many sparring partners. I’m probably one of the lightest people there, and I often find it discouraging to spar with taller stronger men, I’ve been training for 2 years or so, and I’m sure every shorter or just any woman in general has faced the dilemma of being “weaker” than the men in their gym. How do I over some this and build my confidence? What can make my sparring experience with these guys a little better? Any input as a woman fighter would be great! thanks so much!

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